im in dilemma now..
maybe im puttin to high expectation
or maybe ur just bein really friendly
just dowan to reach into tat midst of despair again
yet..i feel tat i should move on?
but true u bein with me this few months enlighten something
tat im a better me.
if only u acknowledged the fact n hinted sumthin or start off : /

typical virgonist

dear blogger
i was agitated yez,
sendin a message to u was a false mistakes,
once again, i am outcast once more..
well, im tired of repeating again cause its never been changed,
u like acting cold n warm?
choosed a seat n u go away? 1.
run away from a phoshot? 2.
oh great ignorance 3.
fine i show u wats ignorance like.
yeah stay away..shooo like wat u usually do..
im a failure in patchin things up, n im tired of failing n falling into the heart ache situation that u will not understand.
and im tat fucking sick since that very day we torn apart, stupid cough just wont barge away.
each passing bad experience just proven we are totally opposite now,
yup move on people, best wish n regards from here.
N sorry, im the worst best pal ever in your life,
N sorry again being part of your life,
N sorry lastly for who i am to you.

Think bout it, u always choose reality over feelings...so go on, go on run away~

blog, to me is just the saddest place to ever come fort
blog, is just a place to express out pain, sorrow, or agony that never felt,
well, blog...is just a digital punching bag,
no matter how hard the blow is, it will be there stagnant
waitin for the next blow..silently it receive it

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFfuUUUUUUUUUUcccccccccccccccccKK U!
u impress me always from the begining
yet still agitate me at the next moment,
is this hows yr doing,
killing everything from yr initial intention
n present the opposite just because of your idealistic mindset of yrs?
just because of tat 1 unflawed in u..,..seriously just tat 1hopeless attitude of yrs
tat ill never understand...
honestly ur just killing everything...i mean everything

oh well, matter no more..cause u only believe yrself, yr selfish self..
n i just seeking  a place to release the tension.. :)

i tend to reafirm myself but lookin at the old post,
but yet my mouth is the cruelest but not my heart,
haha silly old brat, just always noe tat being away is a good thing
u can say a thousand lie to everyone, but not a lie to yrself
but i still lying for not loving u..

after reaching the peak of emoness

in conclusion im weell never better,

let go let go tat silly old chunk,

for say shall never acknowledge anythin bout me,

let go let go tat silly old hope,

for say tat hope together will never be true,

let go let go tat silly old pal,

for say u  prioritize others den me,

let go let go tat silly promises,

for say u never uphold those promise,

let go let go tat silly act,

for say u never appreciate anything  i help,

let go let go o let go,

u have accompany, i have mine:)

a small world of yours,

u wan u remain there, 

i...have done reminiscent for you n your doing,

like once a person,

a pal move on, its a sign more pals are heading your way,

if it meant to lose to you, 

i just have to accept it :)

life sucks to matter how, just prevent it from being suckier, that all

just have to say out before starting new,
i love you 

after living 20 years of life, i never felt as devastated as now,
its not schul, its not exam, its just me,
im a failure in emotions, im a failure in handling stuff,
im yes a failure in being me,
certain times i do really feel like suicide-off
end this fucking life of mine n well die
im tat britttle, im fucking brittle, enough of makin smiley faces, enough of thinking for people
everythin is fake!, this is not my heart desire, its totally not me
im fucking wanna die!!!!
almost reaching the thershold,yea a lil more provocation.n yes im fucking off this world..
no1 will understand how fucking ache is tat heart, how fucking disturbin it is!!
any1 willing to kill me?do plz, i beg u

i feel like leavin kl
i do really wanna leave here
i fucking hate here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
can i just die off? damn this place